Monday, May 23rd, 2016
LET’S JUST SETTLE THIS ONE THING
Women executives are good mothers. Period.
I say this because a recent statement from a good neighbor that reminded me of the unfair misperception of C-level women executives and their mothering. I say it because this is what I experienced and my writing is not theoretical. I write what I see and saw.
1. A neighbor woman who worked at home all her life, said to me yesterday, “I have been surprised to see how much you enjoy babysitting for you granddaughter! And so impressed how close you are with your adult kids. Mine hardly call and yours are in and out of your house and your kids who live away manage to make it home so often. Life is not always fair.”
There is so much in that one statement that could be explored. “How shocking that you are so normal Joyce. And how lucky that your kids love you given the neglect they lived with! My kids were my job. I haven’t received the return on my investment and you got return without investment!!
2. I was lucky enough to be part of the professional development of many top level executive women, four of whom are CEO’s now of well known companies.
Here’s what I saw:
–Sometimes work was neglected and sometimes kids were neglected. Smart women made excruciating choices in a smart way and no choice was damaging long term
–One executive worked at home til late hours and got up early before kids had to get to school (I mean early) so that she could take time in the afternoon for
important kid activities
–I remember one exec-mama (what my kids called me when I tried command and control mothering) who got dressed for work, put on a rain coat, and fed her two kids to avoid the apple sauce smear.
–The women execu-mamas I knew were ferocious about their kids and about their work and learned to live with the feeling of unresolved choice (which if kind of like a continuous stomach ache)
–Some put their families first by having decided to have the dad combine work and home duty creatively. Family came first. Bucking the usual norms (then) worked. And bucking the norms isn’t such a bad CEO quality!
I can see I have more to day about this.
The point I am making is:
Women top executives and CEO’s are good moms.