Saturday, October 28th, 2017


There are plenty of things I’m ambivalent about or happily unknowing about. Thus my book I PRAY ANYWAY: Devotions for the Ambivalent. At the Playshop I held last week, we all admitted to  the excitement of not knowing and also of taking a stance anyway. For the record some people were quite certain of their belief. Oddly the more certainly, the less livliness in some way. This is an exploration for another time and maybe a different blog.

But today I talk about something I’m clear about based on my experience. I trust my intuition. And it does seem to be linked to sacred stuff like grace or Holy Spirit or soul. For me it is a guidance system. Here’s something else, I’m clear about. I believe we are here to find our personal purpose/gift and to find a way to give it or use it. I have a cosmic itch when I am not in alignment with my purpose. When I am off course, I’m still very me, I still do good work, I still make a mess of things, I still enjoy life and I still have the sadnesses of a life long lived. BUT when I have the cosmic itch, I am uncomfortable. I know I’m a few degrees off from my path. I itch. I scratch. I ignore. I itch. I scratch. And finally I listen more closely.

Frankly my book drives me nuts because I have others in me waiting ot get out. But I can tell I’m not done with this one. How? I keep getting ideas that have to be done. They literally nag me. So I am writing a discussion and workshop guide for use with it. That soothes the itch some. I know it right to do. I am asked to join an Executive Coaching group. I say ‘not now’ and have no regret. We go to dinner with Rangeley friends who have read the book and have a great conversation about incarnation and the fact that all spiritual beliefs or religions are meant to do only one thing—Learn to Love Better. I’ve know these dear friends for over twenty years and we’ve never talked like this over dinner in a lovely natural way. OK.

Sometimes I get huge hits of intuition that say, “just do it”. I get energized and nothing can stop me even if it’s difficult. I knew I should go to work at Hannaford Bros after sitting next to the VP of HR at a conference for women..  I got my first OD  job there by receiving a rejection letter for a job I hadn’t applied for!! I knew I would get the role. I went into action, called, was well received and visitied a store to touch the reality of the company and laughed as I got hit in the head with a cabbage tossed by a produce clerk to another clerk. Intuition works in many ways!!

I also knew knew knew that I had to go to an International Gestalt Conference that was quite expensive. I went into action and applied and got accepted and said, ‘yes’ not knowing how I would pay for it. I talked my boss into letting this be my development budget for the next five years if I could go. He said, ‘yes’. It changed my career to global at just the right time.

When my intution hits hard, I feel carbonated. I am excited and clear and I leap to action. Other times I have to heighten my awareness for small hits that say ‘yes’ or ‘no’. That’s where I am now. Where does the path open. Where is it blocked. My job is to take action, large or small, and listen. Action matters. It gives your intuition something to work with.

So I have the cosmic itch. I walk. I listen to clues, dreams, people, a sense of rightness–anything that soothes the itch. Not comfortable, but full of good not knowing.



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